Where do I enlist?

Americorps volunteers are, apparently, the Afro-Socialist shock troops who will keep Real Americans in line (and by lines, I mean bread and medicine lines) when Obama and his pals, George Soros, Ban Ki Moon and Bill Ayers, turn America into a totalitarian oligarchy through provision of free abortions  to billions of illegal aliens and establishment of Sharia Law and criminalization of heterosexuality and mass granny killings and the nationalization of all the conglomerates you hold dear.

Or, something like that. Just ask Glenn Beck, America’s last patriot!

As Jason Linkins sagely put it:

Who hasn’t gazed upon the average gaggle of Americorps volunteers, fresh and clueless from college, and thought to themselves: “From this raw material, I could surely fashion a brutal cadre of fearsome shock troops that will finally bring Western civilization to its knees!”

My best friend just applied to Americorps and her birthday is coming up. I need to scour eBay for an ammo belt to match her fave heels.

The guerilla leader so nice, they named him twice

So wrong, yet hilarious.

Let’s make happy hour happen

Please, lovelies, use the comments to work out the details. Twitter isn’t conducive to event-planning.

You've been warned.

What we’re got so far:

Location: Somewhere in DC (Kramerbooks & Afterwords Cafe has my vote. LOVE their pies.)

Date: Between Sept 18th and 20th. (Saturday night –the 19th– is best for me, because I have to fly in Friday night.)

Who: So far: @mycountryhome @alanna_shaikh @transitionland @ryanbriggs @chrisalbon @TalesFromthHood @endhumantraffic @willtownes  Others are certainly welcome to join in. Michael and Michelle, I’m looking at you. Amanda and Kate, you also.

#whennottotweet

Scenario 1: A possible attack on the US Embassy in Kabul.

At least this one wasn’t real.

Ok. Wow

You know you’ve spent a lot of time with Afghans when your first thought about Bryan Safi is Safi, hmmm? I wonder if he’s part Afghan!

I love my colleagues

From an ongoing, spirited email exchange about Paul Farmer and the future of our agency overlord:

I can see the rationale being handed down now… “No, no, no…Mr. Farmer, due to his excessive involvement with the citizenry over the past 20 years, knows far too many diverse types of people, indicating a lack of focus.”

The reasons Farmer was nixed are the same reasons he was the right person for the job. Sad.

Slow clap

A guy, to me: “So, you’re into Central Asia and stuff, huh? I don’t know anything about Central Asia…you know, all those ‘stans and things that were part of the Soviet Union but no one talked about because they weren’t Russian Russian. But hey! I just got a map of the world shower curtain and I’m memorizing them. I think I can find , uh, Kazakhstan now. I’m good with Africa though.”

At least he’s trying. And to his credit, he could probably draw a decent political map of Africa freehand.

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In other Central Asia blogging news, Joshua at Registan posted the trailer to  a documentary that promises to be equally ridiculous and offensive. It inspired me to create the following map depicting how America sees Central Asia.

I’m a fan of…

The beauty of democracy

The governance organization employee part of me is sadistically thrilled by this.

As the BBC reminds us, dangerous lawmakers can strike at any time, even when they encounter each other away from the parliament buildings that are their native habitats.

The best ever idea in the history of ideas!

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I’ve mentioned this casually before, but now I’m formally calling for it to be brought to fruition –let’s have a development/human rights/humanitarian relief bloggers meetup!

In New York City! Sometime next month!

I want the following bloggers and their readers in:

– Wronging Rights

– Humanitarian Relief

– Stop Genocide

– Aid Watch (Because drinking + belligerent aid debates = awesome)

– The bloggerss at Voices from the Field

– Global Health and Blood and Milk readers (It’s too bad Alanna is in Dushanbe, but I’m sure she has a large NY readership)

– Tales From The Hood

I am forgetting a lot of people. Please add your suggestions in the comments.

So, does this sound good to you guys?